Our thermometer is slowly creeping up! Thank you to whomever gave us the envelope of money a week ago at church and to the person (M) who donated money through our agency! We are so grateful!!!!
Friday, January 18, 2013
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Boo hoo...Whaaaaaa
That is me crying...why? Because we didn't get the one and only grant that we could apply for. It's hard not to take it personally that we were rejected! I know that God has this and that there is a reason the other families receive this financial assistance. It doesn't make it any easier to see the rejection letter though. No reason behind it other than they (the grant providers) prayed over all the applications and were drawn to other families. We prayed over applying and receiving this grant...ya...what can I say?!?!? I know this is just bitterness talking but I feel discouraged.
I hate not hearing anything about where our paperwork is at. I don't like that I can't communicate with our B* agency because it has to be done through the guys here. I am discouraged with all the red tape and stupid rules. I want people to be on our team...to fight with us...to think outside the box and try to see things from our point of view!
I'm tired of seeing how easy it is for a certain country to adopt internationally. Canada needs to learn a thing or two about how to make it easier to adopt! What a gong show! I get it...there are rules in place for a reason...yep, get it! I like rules, I have always been a rule follower (except for speeding...shh...I maaaaay have a heavy foot here and there....). When people don't explain the rational behind the rules and procedures, or worse...the people of authority don't even know why they are in place...then I get mad!
I am mad! This isn't a happy post today. I wanted to have the raw emotions out there and this is how I (we) feel at the moment! Discouraged, frustrated, sad.
I have come across two files recently of children that we are eligible for... I want to know why my agencies haven't discussed them with us. Why do I get to see a picture of one amazing child only to see another family say they are going for her!?! I try. I give up. I can't challenge that other country. They have so much more flexibility.
I know what you are thinking...I am talking a lot about...ME! MY wants, MY desires, MY expectations... this adoption is about the little girl that GOD has planned for us. Why am I having such a hard time accepting this? I feel like these files come up and we pray over them and ask things like, "why did we see them? Is this who we should be fighting for? Do we inquire? Do we just sit still and wait? Do we do nothing BUT wait?" I want God's direct line! What are we supposed to do right now!?!??!
Pray.
That is all I can do. That is what I am asking of those who are reading this. I have no strength. I haven't for a while. I need to be lifted in prayer. Satan is fighting this adoption again. He can't win...he can't get in my head and cause doubt and anger and sadness anymore!
Please pray. God moves mountains. I live in a town, LITERALLY surrounded by mountains (there is a mountain every direction that I look). Mountains are huge. This adoption isn't huge for God.
Thanks for supporting us.
I hate not hearing anything about where our paperwork is at. I don't like that I can't communicate with our B* agency because it has to be done through the guys here. I am discouraged with all the red tape and stupid rules. I want people to be on our team...to fight with us...to think outside the box and try to see things from our point of view!
I'm tired of seeing how easy it is for a certain country to adopt internationally. Canada needs to learn a thing or two about how to make it easier to adopt! What a gong show! I get it...there are rules in place for a reason...yep, get it! I like rules, I have always been a rule follower (except for speeding...shh...I maaaaay have a heavy foot here and there....). When people don't explain the rational behind the rules and procedures, or worse...the people of authority don't even know why they are in place...then I get mad!
I am mad! This isn't a happy post today. I wanted to have the raw emotions out there and this is how I (we) feel at the moment! Discouraged, frustrated, sad.
I have come across two files recently of children that we are eligible for... I want to know why my agencies haven't discussed them with us. Why do I get to see a picture of one amazing child only to see another family say they are going for her!?! I try. I give up. I can't challenge that other country. They have so much more flexibility.
I know what you are thinking...I am talking a lot about...ME! MY wants, MY desires, MY expectations... this adoption is about the little girl that GOD has planned for us. Why am I having such a hard time accepting this? I feel like these files come up and we pray over them and ask things like, "why did we see them? Is this who we should be fighting for? Do we inquire? Do we just sit still and wait? Do we do nothing BUT wait?" I want God's direct line! What are we supposed to do right now!?!??!
Pray.
That is all I can do. That is what I am asking of those who are reading this. I have no strength. I haven't for a while. I need to be lifted in prayer. Satan is fighting this adoption again. He can't win...he can't get in my head and cause doubt and anger and sadness anymore!
Please pray. God moves mountains. I live in a town, LITERALLY surrounded by mountains (there is a mountain every direction that I look). Mountains are huge. This adoption isn't huge for God.
Thanks for supporting us.
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