Slow and Steady Wins the (adoption) Race

Slowly and steady our adoption funds are going up, up, up!  What a fantastic view!!!  We have almost everything for our referral fees, B* agency fees and travel #1.  At least we can meet our child now... although, we may be sleeping on the street and starving ha ha! 

We were also told by our agency that they have increased some of their fees again. This will affect us when we need to get our homestudy updated after a year... Yipee!  More money to find.  ARG!

We have come across some amazing people in the adoption world.  Simply amazing, selfless people.  Individuals who sacrifice so much to fund adoptions, advocates of adoption that raise awareness and/or funds for other families, and all around giving people that WANT to help orphans find families! 

Honestly, before we embarked on this journey, we didn't see the plight of the orphans from a global perspective.  We were just open to the idea of growing our family with children that needed families.  We were especially drawn to children with special needs because they are the most overlooked.  After researching orphans with special needs, and the lack of care and dignity these precious humans receive, we were more drawn to advocating and adopting internationally. 

We know this is a huge step of faith.  We (I) often get sucked into the material ideas and possessions of our society.  Some days, I just don't know how individuals and families can just let go in utter faith.  I am working on this, but embarrassingly, I often fail. 

Some days I think I have it all planned out... we will patiently wait for the child God chose for us, we will have the funds as needed, we will travel, fall in love, everything will go swimmingly, our daughter will join us, we will live happily ever after, the end.

MOST other days are not like that in my head....NOT.AT.ALL.  I am impatiently waiting, bitter, antsy, snappy, mad that there is such a HUGE orphan crisis, mad that this takes so long to be a family, mad at everyone involved because there are many "logistics" that aren't logical in Canada, jealous of families that find their children, scared that we will have to sell an arm and a leg to fund this thing, petrified about travelling, scared that our daughter will be too much for us to handle (yep, I said it out loud), scared about catching some kind of parasite (yes, I am actually quite concerned about this ha ha), and just generally questioning my ability as a parent. 

Through all this mental torture, I can still find a small window of peace.  I think that there are  people praying for us still because often times when I just want to throw in the towel and move on, something/someone reminds me that this isn't about me at all!  This is God's will.  His plan. He is using US.  We are blessed to be given this opportunity...humbled that God's plan involves us...all we have to do is be obedient, listen have faith and follow His lead :)

I wonder what else God has planned for us?

What does He have planned for you???  Are you being called to be obedient and step out in Faith?  Are you aware of something that needs you to act accordingly?  What is on your heart?  What have your eyes seen that cannot be undone?