Blessed

I know this is a bit late.  It has been a crazy busy week.  School was winding down for Christmas break and we had three concerts for the girls this week.  Then to top things off, I have been sick for two weeks (going on three) and the girls have been taking turns becoming sick in one way or another. 

Our first fundraiser was hosted by our church last Sunday.  Let me just say...it went above and beyond our expectations.  God told us to trust Him.  I admit, that I panicked, I doubted and I was scared that the fundraiser wasn't going to be a success.  My standard for a successful event was to *hopefully* fundraise something over $500 (I was really hoping for $1000).  Can you imagine our surprise when we were told that we were blessed with EIGHT times the amount that I predicted!?!?!Eight TIMES...our church raised and blessed our family with over $4000!!!!!!  Our NEXT set of fees is available!!!!! As soon as we get a proposal we are ready to go :)   Well, that is until we have to travel ha ha!

Thank you to all who donated items to our auction; the kids who created the art and ornaments to be auctioned and, of course, the people who bid and donated financially.  We are humbled and grateful to be able to put these blessings towards this little girl's ransom!  Our daughter-to-be was blessed with a BEAUTIFUL blanket that was donated by one awesome lady and bid by another amazing woman.  The bidder donated it to our little one!  I CAN NOT wait to wrap her up in it!  It's so soft and heavy.  It will be a great sensory blanket for her!

We were in total shock and disbelief for a couple of days following the news of the amount raised.  We were filled with so many emotions. We felt extremely blessed and humbled and in complete awe.  We also felt like fools because we got scared, because we panicked and questioned and doubted leading up to the day.  We keep seeing the awesomeness of God and how He is preparing the way for his child.  God put us on this path and He is definitely making the path straight!  Maybe one day I will get over myself and stop taking things into my own hands; stop worrying and doubting and trust more. 

“I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it would move. Nothing would be impossible.  (Matt 17:20)

This verse played over and over in my head the days leading up to the fundraiser.  A mustard seed is so very very tiny and I can't even come up with that much faith at times!  Even when I know in my heart and have seen the proof and keep telling myself, " God has a plan, God is in control, trust God, etc", I would still hear the voice of opposition.  Sometimes it comes through thoughts of doubt and fear and other times it comes through other people's words and actions.

While we wait for our paperwork to be accepted by the B government, we ask that people join us in prayer as we wait to hear the results of the grant we applied for.  We *should* be hearing back with the decision in the next couple of weeks.  It will be also be a huge blessing to our adoption fund! It still frustrates me how expensive international adoption is.  It's just not fair to the poor children that are waiting for a family.  Thank you to everyone that prays for us.  Thank you so much!

Dossier going to country

Our Dossier has taken its trip around Canada!  Whoop whoop!  It is being sent off to B in the next day or so (at least that is what my agency had said).  I just mailed off the next fees to the agency today too.  Nothing like paying over $2000 right before Christmas!  Barf!  Oh well, maybe, just maybe we will have our wee one here next Christmas????  You never know!

I went to the bank today to get the money order (we had to have the fees transferred to USD funds...make sense???  I don't think so either!).  The lady helping me waived the bank fees once she figured out it was for an adoption.  How nice was that!?!?  I, then, went back to the post office (they know me there now ha ha) to have the money order mailed off.  I must have sounded like a crazy lady to them. I was basically saying to the poor lady behind the counter that the envelope was a money order and asked if it was best to register mail it because it is worth a lot of money and I didn't want it lost or anything blah blah blah....ha ha!  She looked at the envelope that clearly states it's to the adoption agency and tells me that the truck is out back and she'll stick it on right now (which she did as I was standing there).  Wow!  Nice people today!  God put the right people in my path today.

Now it is time to get the fundraising pumping!  Once the dossier is submitted to the Ministry of Justice in B, they will review it and may request additional documents (arg, I pray they don't need anything else from us!!!).  Once our application is accepted, we will be entered into the database of adoptive applicants waiting to be matched with our daughter!!!!  Oh.My.Goodness!!!!  Yikes!

Once we are matched (this could be very quickly or could be a while too), we will be required to pay our agency $4700 to go ahead and proceed.  So...this is the next targeted fee!  It looks VERY daunting.  We are still praying that we receive the grant from ABBA.  It would make a HUGE dent in the $4700.  Please add this to your prayers. 

After the proposal fees are paid, then come the ones for the agency in B, travel, accommodations, orphanage donations, food, passport for child, etc.  After talking with the travel agent, we estimate our travel to be over $6000 each trip.  Yay!  Factor in the B agency fees, etc this portion of the adoption process will cost around $20000. 

What a scary number.  I think I may need to have a piece of chocolate! 

God has opened doors throughout this journey.  We continue to ask for your prayers, specifically for the grant to be given to us, the paperwork to get to the right people, the forms to be good, ,all the people involved in every aspect of this journey, our family, the little girl we are waiting for, and for the fundraiser on Sunday to be successful. 

Thanks!

Fundraiser Number One

The title of this post is pretty self-explanatory.  We have been blessed by a wonderful lady from our church who has set up a fundraiser for our family's adoption.  She has gone beyond what we could have imagined. 

The children in our church have worked sooooo hard at making BEAUTIFUL art work to be auctioned and ornaments to be sold by donation.  The church foyer is decorated with all of these pieces.  I can't step into the church without wanting to bawl my eyes out because of people's love.  Children have come up to me and shared what they made to donate to help bring the little girl home.  Some of these children "get it"!  We are humbly honoured and thankful.  This little girl probably will never understand the process it took to get her here but she will feel the love that surrounds her. 

The second part of the fundraiser is a gift-bag auction.  People have filled and donated  themed gift bags (such as crafts, tools, coffee, tea, etc) to be auctioned off next Sunday following the Children's Christmas Play.  These bags are AWESOME!  People have donated stuff that I would love to get for Christmas :).  My sister was visiting a few weeks ago and made a few of the bags (along with my mom that sent them here).  What support!  I am tearing up right now as I write this.  This little girl, whom we don't know yet, is blessed to have AMAZING people fighting for her arrival. 

Please pray for this fundraiser to be successful. Please also pray for the dossier to make it to country quickly and with no problems.  God has a plan and we are honoured to be a part of it.  We have felt God's presence in way's that we can't describe.  I know that there are people that read this blog that don't understand the whole "God thing" and we have even been asked to tone down the "God stuff".  We can't do it though.  Once God is the focus of your life, you view life differently.  Things that seem hopeless have hope.  Things that are impossible become possible through Jesus.  God has called us to adopt; to take a leap of FAITH.  To put our full trust and obedience in Him.  He never said it would be easy.  Some of the trials we have had, we have come out with a better understanding of why it happened that way (sometimes it takes a looooonnnngg time to see it mind you).

Thank you to all who are supporting us, whether it is by your words of encouragement or listening to us rant, or by praying for us, or by providing to the auction, or financial contributions/donations.  We are grateful for all the support. 

Another Raw (humbling) Day

 There are many people reading our blog now. It is really weird. People in the process of adopting, people looking into adoption themselves, friends, family, strangers, people from our church, people from our community, people whom we may or may not know.  Sometimes it is hard to do this blog because we are generally VERY private people.  A good friend of mine had mentioned that I write things here that even she didn`t know about me and our family.

This blog was started for many reasons.  One of them was to keep friends and family in the loop, another was to journal for other adoptive families.  Part of journaling is to share the raw, deep feelings and emotions.  If we sugar-coated everything about this process, other adopting families may view their hardships as uncommon and specific to them.

Today was a day that I was being tested.  I am ashamed to say that I was losing this battle.  I shed tears.  Not a pretty sight.  I think there is just so much build up of anticipation right now. 

Our dossier is still taking it`s trip around Canada getting authenticated and notarized by all the fancy-schmany government people.  I am tired of it being in Canada!  I want this puppy (the dossier) to be in Europe already!  I am impatient, I know...I`m working on it. 

We had a minor scare with the grant folks today.  They told us we were missing all of our references (three people had to fill out a one page form on us).  Yikes!  Turns out, they had the wrong family.  Phew!  That would have been a hassle to gather those forms again.

Our first ever fundraiser for our family`s adoption is in less than two weeks away.  Although we have had some positive feedback, I am really quite nervous about it too.  I feel like there have been a couple of stumbling blocks and confusion about how it is going to run and I am honestly quite nervous that it could flop. I want that fairy godmother moment... the one where she waves a magical wand and makes everything little detail just perfect.  Ahh...wishful thinking :)

I am having such a hard time accepting that it is OK to fundraise.  I feel like people are judging me and I don`t like it one bit.  When I get like this, I have to remember that we are not raising funds for ME...we are raising money to free a child from the bondage of her orphanage walls.  This child DESERVES people to fight for her.  She is God`s child every bit as much as I am!  She DESERVES to be loved and cared for and have a mom and dad who are willing to step out in FAITH for her!  She DESERVES a church family to grow up with.  She DESERVES to go to school and have sisters, grandparents, aunts and uncles and cousins who love her, she deserves to play freely and try different foods and activities!  God made her!  God put her here for a PURPOSE!  SHE HAS A PURPOSE! 

And so, when things don't work in our favour, I get scared.  I freak out.  I get overwhelmed and emotional.  After my epic temper tantrums about how this all sucks,  I realize that I am taking this adoption back into my hands again.  I am not being patient.  I am not trusting in God, that He has a plan and a purpose for all of this.  And so, I pray.

Today, my daughters and I joined hands together and we prayed.  Literally, within minutes, things changed.  The paperwork for the grant wasn't missing anymore.

This evening, I made a comment to a friend about the money involved.  I said something to him along these lines: "I still need close to $30 000... is it just going to rain from the sky?!?!??! (lots of sarcasm in voice)".  I got back home and there was a message on our machine about someone wanting to donate to our adoption.  SERIOUSLY?!?!?!?  Umm...sorry God.  I didn't trust You... I feel like a tool.

Ten minutes after that call, I found out I won an awesome fancy cake that I am able to use as another fundraiser!  How cool is that!?!?!

Prayer...  Powerful.  Useful.  Required.  Needed.

 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7).

Thank you for those who prayed for us today when we asked. Thank you to those who are praying for us when we don't. 

Grant Application

We just got an email from the folks who are reviewing our application for a grant!!!  Very exciting :)

Would you please pray for this Grant to be Granted (pun intended ha ha).  Seriously though, we could really use the grant money.  Hopefully they will approve us and hopefully for the full amount :)

This was the only grant that we were eligible to apply for (at least we think we're eligible...).  It would be blessing indeed.

Thanks for reading!

Put on every piece of God's armor

I started writing a post a couple of weeks ago that I feel so very strongly about.  I decided to put it on the shelf for a while though because I don't believe that now is the time to publish it.  Let me just say, though, how very grateful we are for all the works of God's hand surrounding this adoption.

I know I get angry, frustrated, overwhelmed, etc with this whole process.  It is long and tedious and invasive.  If we didn't go through this process, we wouldn't be the people we are today, would we? 

This adoption literally saved my life.  Prior to our home study, we read up on adoption requirements for various countries.  One of the things that hit me the hardest was how some countries required a person to be under a certain body mass index.  This got me thinking A LOT.  I didn't want the reason I was rejected from a country to be based on my weight.  I figured that this was something I had control of in this process.  So, before we took the plunge, I dedicated myself to eating right and exercising.  A year ago, we started filling out our application form with the agency.  One year later, I am a different person on the inside as well as the outside!

I have lost over 70 pounds.  I am no longer considered obese or even overweight!  I am actually considered a normal weight!  I still have a bit more work to get myself to where I want to be but for now, I am content.  I can't believe this....today as I type, I feel content about so much that is happening in my life! I feel incredibly blessed and for once, I feel like I am where I need to be! 

I praise God for moving my family here and bringing us to a church that we actually feel like being a part of!  I am meeting incredible people lately everywhere we go.  Yesterday, for example, we took the girls to Tim Horton's as a treat after their kickboxing tournament.  It was so busy so we had to take up two different tables.  Right next to us, a couple began talking to us and connected with our family as they had 4 older daughters.  They were such an encouragement and a testimony to us.  They raised a doctor, two lawyers and an architect!  Wow!  From this town! 

Today I talked with a woman from our church who was told, when she was pregnant, that her unborn baby was going to have Down Syndrome! This boy's life was SAVED because his parents didn't believe in abortion even if they were told this child would have special needs!!!! GUESS WHAT is even sadder???? This boy DOES NOT have Down syndrome! The test was wrong! I have said this before but, did you know that the abortion rate for a PRENATAL diagnosis of Down syndrome is over 90% (this is North America people). Because of this, their family has also had it put on their heart to adopt a child with Down Syndrome! Ummm....AWESOME!!!  They will be in our prayers, please put them in yours. :D

Yesterday, I participated in my first ever kickboxing tournament!  Although I was scared beyond belief, I was also finally in a position of feeling honored that I was privileged enough to be given this opportunity.  I worked and trained and was pushed encouraged to compete.  I actually did it!  I took the plunge, put myself out there, geared up and participated.  I came out of it with more knowledge about myself, more courage and more respect for the sport. 

I feel like this adoption is the same way.  It scares the snot out of me, and yet,  I feel so honoured and humbled that God has put us on this path.  It is hard work and lots of training but we are fighting this fight!!!  We are fighting for a child that we do not know yet; a child that does not know us; a child that God has chosen.  We will come against people that will try to bring us down, people that throw hurtful words at us or wait for us to fail.  We will be kicked by bureaucracies and red tape.  We will have to put ourselves in the ring and humbly accept the help from others.  In the end, with God as our coach and our armour, we shall be blessed with another daughter.

Ephesians 6:13-18 says:

 

"Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. ¹⁴ Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. ¹⁵ For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared.¹⁶ In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil.¹⁷ Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

¹⁸ Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere."

 

 

So, where are we at in the adoption???

 

Our part of the dossier is finished and has been sent to our agency.  They have had the documents notarized and are sending the papers to Ottawa.  In Ottawa, the papers will be taken to the department of Foreign Affairs for authentication (they basically stamp the documents to confirm they were notarized properly).  Once this is done, they are sent to the consulate in Toronto for legalization (this is where they approve the authentication of the documents).  After, the dossier gets sent back to the agency to be notarized ONE MORE time before they are sent to our BC ministry who THEN finally forwards it on to our designated country.  There, they will be translated and submitted to their Ministry.  WOWZERS!  Those papers are taking a serious road trip! 

 

Please pray for the papers to get to their designated people and places without a hitch.  Please pray for all the people involved in our paperwork.  Please pray for us as we sit and wait for all of this to take place.  It should take a guesstimated time frame of a month...seriously though....I'd like to see this to believe it!!!  Adoption is not quick! 

 

It does, however give us time to fundraise!  Our church has put on a fundraiser for us next month.  PLEASE pray for God's provision and guidance as we still need to come up with half of our designated fees.  Our next big chunk will be at the time of our proposal.  If you have questions about our fees, etc. Click on the big thermometer to the right :)

 

Thank you for praying and supporting our family.  A child's freedom IS worth all of this!

Dossier to be mailed to agency tomorrow (today)

I am getting excited again!  After one month of waiting for hubby's test results, we finally got them today!  Whoot whoot.  He's in the clear (and we knew he would be but having the test done was just another procedure we had to endure).  Unfortunately, however, when I went to pick up both of our forms from the doctor's office, mine was nowhere to be found.  Seriously?!?!? Arg!  Hopefully tomorrow morning (hmm, it looks like it is after midnight now so, more like today) this will be cleared up and I can sing and dance my tushy all the way to the post office with my dossier paperwork.  Oh ya, oh ya!!!  Whoot whoot! 

Also being mailed off tomorrow (or should I say "today" ha ha) is an application for an adoption grant we are applying for.  The maximum they will "grant" is $3500.  I'm hoping that all of our hard work gets us a full grant.  Honestly, I will be happy with anything.  I am not greedy.  The paperwork for this sucker was ridiculous though!  It was worse than the dossier paperwork (actually it was very similar but in a more frustrating/personal way)!  It was 14 pages long, we needed three references (a friend, coworker and our pastor), copies of our licences, home study, income tax return, and pay stub!  Did I mention how insane this was?!?!?  We EACH had to write paragraphs about our church involvement (it is a Christian-based grant), spiritual testimony, why we are adopting, philosophies on education and spirituality training of our kids, our parenting style and skills training we may have received, and our views on certain Bible topics (creation, "the fall", redemption).  We also had to give a very THOROUGH account of all of our assets, liabilities, net worth and cash flow. 

Seriously, the work to create this grant application was excessive and, in all honesty, I just about said screw it!  I had to think of the end result every time I felt this way.  When all is said and done, our daughter will be worth all of this!

I wonder what tomorrow's Canada Post bill will be?  I'm thinking that I will register mail the dossier paperwork for sure as I need to send an original marriage certificate.  I think the other package needs to be registered also since it contains so much personal stuff.  I don't know!!?!?!  I looked into UPS and Purelator and they seem cheaper but more hassle.  Not too sure because I live in the middle of nowhere according to the rest of the province.  I think hubby will have to look into this for us (like he doesn't have anything better to do with his time...)

Thank you to all who have been praying for us. Without a doubt, we are truly grateful for the support we received from so many people.  Truly, truly grateful.

Well, it is off to bed for me.  Tomorrow is going to be a killer to get up for.  Kids included as they were trick-or-treating well past their bedtimes.  Take care!